TOT 128: Training in Streamlining

In live mediations often we come across parties and/ or participants, who talk too much. They speak too fast or too slow. They start from something and move on to several different topics. Many times they speak out of context. They start remembering everything that has happened in their lives and start giving complete details about the same. Once they press the ‘start’ button they forget the ‘end’ button.  It becomes very difficult for the mediator. At times even the mediator’s gentle intervention is either ignored or refused to be acknowledged by such party/s/participants. However mediator cannot ignore the importance of listening to such person/s. Streamlining the conversation becomes a great challenge.

The following techniques can be used:

Allowing to speak uninterruptedly and making notes

1. Allowing the party to speak (even if it is for hours). Noting down the bullet points.
2. Showing them the bullet points. Asking them to underline the points that are relevant according to them for the resolution of the dispute.
3. Mediator does not speak, but listens actively.

 (This helps in streamlining the conversation during the next session.)

Asking them to write down and handover the same

1. Asking the participant to write down everything in detail (irrespective of the number of pages) and hand over the same to the mediator and take it back. They may also be given the choice to mail the same.
2. As the party starts speaking, mediator points out that the same is mentioned by the party and that the mediator has read it
3. Showing them the point/s mediator has underlined and asking them to speak only about it.

Demonstrating your interest in listening

1. The mediator does not make any statements that would make them feel that they are interrupted, or being avoided.
2. The mediator informs them gently that he/she would like them to speak to them more about “….point” and “…..” point.
3. The mediator demonstrates his/her interest in listening to them.

The following exercise may be used in training programs:

1. Give general case history.
2. Ask the trainee mediator to listen to the narrative.
3. Give a hint (in private) to the trainee/party to speak at length about anything and everything under the sun and occasionally about some points relevant to the dispute.
4. Watch how the trainee mediator handles the situation.
5. If the trainee mediator is unable to handle, one of the trainers has to step in.
6. Follow the technique mentioned above.

Where is this exercise used?

This exercise is generally used in advanced training programs.

“Pathetically, Here I am again, Rereading our old conversation as if it was like yesterday”

Weirdo.in

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(All Copyrights reserved by the author S.Susheela)