In the context of mediation training curriculum refers to course work and the contents of training program.

Time table refers to schedule of events with time slots.

A trainer cannot ignore the importance of both. Designing a training program involves lots of inputs. It needs focus, attention, devotion of quality time, experience, expertise, and co-ordination amongst trainers. Designing is an art. It is not just a technique.

Step 1: Preparing the curriculum

The subjects/main topics and some of the main sub-topics to be covered have to be identified.

Step 2: Working with the curriculum

A decision has to be taken amongst co-trainers as to which subject/topic/subtopic would be handled by whom.

TIME TABLE

1. Table Time table

This is the time table which will be circulated to trainees.

It should have (i) Date (ii) Subject-Topic-subtopic (iii) Time slot for each topic/sub topic including for Recap-Key learning points, role plays, feedback/interaction, tea and lunch break etc.

Mentioning the names of resource person/s is optional.

Mentioning the names of resource persons will have its own advantage.

Structuring the Table time table

It is ideal to include subtopics also along with topics. Table Time table should create interest in those

1. Who do not know anything about the subject.
2. Who already have some broader idea about the subject but the time table gives them a hint that there is much more to learn.
3. Who are in the field of training – who would like to attend the training and see whether the table time is a workable time table. They may be enthusiastic to know whether what is projected in the time table is achieved by the trainers or not. 

2. Working time table

This time table will be with the trainers alone.

This will have to be prepared in complete co-ordination amongst trainers.

In this, each topic will be divided in to several sub topics.(i) Who will deal with which topic/sub topic (ii)Time required for the same will have to be specified.

Even for role plays, who is going to be in charge of which session(s)/which day’s role play, what is the time to be allotted for briefing and debriefing, for distribution of relevant materials etc. has to be decided well in advance in this working time table.

3. Personal time table

It is ideal to have a personal time table for each topic or sub topic to be dealt with by each individual trainer.

(A) In this, if a trainer is taking the session on a given topic, she/he has to allocate time for contents, instructions, exercises, stories, examples, question and answer session, simulation exercises, slide presentation etc. Depending on the availability of time, trainer has to decide what tools and modes should or should not be chosen.

(B) Material/s to be circulated well in advance:

Trainer is required to make arrangements to see to it that required material is given to the trainees well in advance or distributed amongst them during the session. 

Should make a note in this time table as to when the material is to be sent and to whom it is to be sent and should follow it up diligently.

• Instructions to the trainees must be clearly noted in the material circulated.
• Personal Time table can be prepared any time before the training.
• But, it is always better to finalize it on the day before the time table.

At times, the personal time table may have to be fine-tuned just before the commencement of the session. Such situation arises, when the trainer taking the  previous session has consumed a considerable time from your slot, or a trainer who is supposed to take session after your session, might have informed his/her inability to attend the program as a resource person.   

Advantages

1. Structuring the training process strengthens the  training program
2. It helps avoiding confusion.
3. It reduces stress and anxiety during training.
4. It demonstrates professionalism.
5. It helps in streamlining the training session.
6. It helps the trainer to be on track.
7. It helps in effective management of time.

Shortfalls

1. Not taking the task of designing the time table seriously.
2. Giving excuses: Someone is unwell/ there is a family function/there are guests/co-trainers are not co-operating etc. Trainer has to understand that if there is some pressing personal inconvenience, he/she should withdraw from offering his/her services as a resource person. Having given commitment they should take all steps to design the timetable.
   For a trainer who has attended  3-4 training programs, it may not be very difficult to design the time table.
3. Not maintaining the earlier time tables in the personal folder of the trainer, which can be looked into for reference or guidance of any kind.
4. Not spending quality time in learning and mastering the art of designing, even after attending several trainings as a trainer.
5. Not taking a comparative note of the time table prepared by a trainer and other co-trainers
6. Considering giving presentation alone is the main responsibility of the trainer.    
7. Allocating  more time for a particular topic without having relevant material to keep the trainees engaged for such long time.
8. Overstuffing the time table with topics/sub topics without foreseeing whether the same would be workable or not.

WHY SHOULD DESIGNING BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY?

By looking at the proposed Table time table the participants may either gain interest or lose interest in the training. They may even judge the entire program based on the way in which it is designed or structured. They may start speculating the competence of the trainers looking at the manner in which the Table time table is projected.

WHAT BEST CAN BE DONE BY TRAINERS?

The moment any one is assigned with the role of trainer, irrespective of whether the training is immediately forthcoming or after six months, it is ideal to have several sets of time tables designed and kept ready for forty hours’ training programs, advanced trainings, and refresher courses etc. These materials can be looked into while preparing  time table for a given program.

Once a trainer is invited as a resource person, inputs can be taken from the folder and suitable changes can be made.

This exercise will help the trainers in designing the time table when they are called upon to do so within few hours.

Personal time table on each topic has to be kept ready well in advance.

Trainer has to keep personal time table/s on each topic starting from 30 minutes’ slot to three hours’ slot in the trainer’s kit.

“Give me six hours to chop down a tree and I will spend the first four sharpening the axe”

Abraham Lincoln

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One of the pitfalls in which a trainer can easily get trapped is the temptation to focus more on ‘trainer’s performance’. At times, Trainer’s preparation revolves more around how best his/her performance level should be, how can he/she become more popular, how can he/she be acknowledged and appreciated by every one as more informative and knowledgeable etc. The focus is more on “me and/or on I”. There is nothing wrong if a trainer has these expectations. The question is, should a trainer entertain such expectations at all? There is difference in being more knowledgeable and expecting others to acknowledge one as a knowledgeable person without actually being knowledgeable. Acknowledgment, popularity, appreciation are all by products of one’s caliber. These will have to necessarily follow the merit. But, when the trainer is working on himself/herself, working in the path of becoming an excellent or extraordinary trainer, such temptations should not be the driving factors. Such temptations and expectations will bring down the level of performance of a trainer. Such trainers cannot handle constructive criticisms. They feel very low and let down if on a given day their performance does not stand out. If other trainers or co-trainers are appreciated, they cannot withstand. They are generally in their own world. They do not want to connect to people but they try only to communicate. There will be transmission of abundant information, which the trainees can as well get through google or other means. They are not bothered to focus on the need of the trainees. Even though some amongst such trainers might have done need assessment on paper, they may not be practically able to cater to the needs of the trainees, as they are totally engrossed in catering to their own needs.

Best training is the one where the focus is on the trainees. What is it that I can do to see to it that trainees turn out to be best mediators? What examples can I give? What case studies can I quote?  What stories can I tell? Which slides should I be showing? How do I conduct the role plays? etc. to see to it that trainees get the best from this training are to be some of the questions driving the trainer in his/her preparation.

How does one know whether the trainer is focused on himself/herself or on the trainees?

Trainer does not even bother to know whether the trainees are understanding the concepts or not.

Trainer does not stop even when the trainees are lost midway and are not moving along with the trainer.

Once such trainers stand they would not sit until either they get exhausted, or someone forces them to stop.

They pour more and more information which flows over and above the receptive capacity of trainees.

They are in their own world. At the end of the sessions they wait for others to come and congratulate them, and feel disappointed if this does not happen.

How to overcome this?     

Every trainer has to necessarily remember that:

1. Training is for the benefit of trainees.
2. Training cannot be considered as a platform meant only for the growth of the trainer, notwithstanding the fact that with each training every trainer grows.
3. Trainer should spend quality time in improving his/her professional skills.
4. Trainer should constantly cross check with the trainees as to whether they have understood what was conveyed by the trainer. Trainer should also cross check with co-trainers as to whether in their opinion they felt that the trainer conveyed to the trainees what was required to be conveyed.
5. Trainer has to remember that training is not meant for delivering what all the trainer knows on various topics, but is meant to deliver what is required to be delivered to the trainees in the given training.

How does one know that the trainer is on the right path?

1. Trainer confines to the topic under consideration.
2. Does not encroach upon any other topics allotted to other trainers.
3. Does not deviate from the subject matter.
4. Does not give unnecessary examples/case studies/stories/display slides etc.
5. Does not boast or start self-praising .
6. Carefully and calculatedly uses the words “I” and “me”
7. Does not answer questions posed by the trainees, even when the trainer knows the answer/s if the question/s does/do not relate to the topic under consideration or even connected to the topic under consideration, but informs the trainees the reason for not answering the same.
8. Values every minute’s time of the trainees  and  the co trainers.

“When I am concerned about myself and speak about myself you are at a distance. When I am concerned about you and speak for you, you are nearer to me.”

Slamw

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This technique is used more in advanced trainings. It can also be used in refresher courses if the trainees have experience of mediating more than 100 cases.

Example

1. Petition for annulment of marriage filed by husband.

Husband’s allegations: Wife claimed herself to be B.Tech graduate. But fifteen days after marriage he found out from her certificates that she has just completed P.U.C, that too in attempts. Trust is shattered. He cannot live with her as she is a liar. They are separated immediately after 15 days of marriage.

Wife’s counter: Husband had advertised for a homemaker wife. Hence her qualification is immaterial. She had passed PUC in attempts, but later she did her Engineering., i.e, B.Tech from open university. Husband is not believing those certificates. Wife wants reunion.

Both are sticking onto their positions.

Question: What can be done?

Trainer collects answers from all the trainees.

Usefulness: This Case study can be used to train the trainees in generating multiple options. Such training may help the trainees in their actual mediations while assisting the disputing parties in the generation of options.
Such case studies will prepare them to handle Impasse situations. 

2. Suit for partition filed by sisters against brothers.

Brothers did not want to give anything to sisters. Sisters gave an indication that they being rich were not looking forward to equal share. During mediation brothers offered to give three acres of land to each sister as against their entitlement for twenty acres to each.   

Mediator conveyed the same to the sisters. “Your brothers are ready to give three acres to each of you. Are you ready to take it?”

Sisters got wild and walked away from mediation.

Question : Where did the mediator go wrong?

Usefulness: This case study can be helpful while teaching the concept of “reactive devaluation” and “hiding the source’. It can also be used in neutral reframing of even the questions while communicating the offers from one side to the other. It can also be used to reinforce the basic principle “watch your words”. It can also be used to teach how parties lose trust in the mediator when the mediator being an advocate is unable to comprehend the legal proposition as to “who is the giver” and “who is the taker”.

Trainer’s role

Trainer should keep a dairy with case studies relating to different concepts. It should always be with the trainer as a ready reference.

Trainer should prepare a very short case study note, so that it does not take more than three minutes to communicate it to the trainees.

Without an underlying concept being there no case study is to be taken for discussion.

Depending on the availability of time, the participation from all the trainees can be encouraged and detailed discussions can be encouraged.

Challenge to the trainer

1. To prepare very short case studies with needful inputs.
2. To make the case study a bridge between theory and practice.
3. For every topic at least 3-4 case studies may have to be kept ready by the trainer.

Advantages

1. Trainees very easily learn the concepts supported by case studies.
2. Trainer can easily get connected to the trainees through case studies.
3. Difficult concepts can be made understandable through case studies.
4. How techniques can be made implementable can be demonstrated through case studies.

“Don’t decrease the goal. Increase the effort.”

Tom Coleman – Bodybuilder

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This technique of “Partnering the Role Play” is used in refresher courses and in advanced trainings. This technique needs a lot of preparation beforehand. Each of the trainees is asked to prepare a short role play with facts of a mediated but unsettled case. Each trainee is asked to bring three sets of this role play. They are asked to choose two partners. A group of three is asked to be formed. The trainee who had prepared the role play, and who was a mediator in actual mediation will be asked to play the role of one of the parties. The mediation goes on. The impasse situation which the trainee as a mediator could not overcome in actual mediation, will be projected by the same trainee to the mediator during the course of the role play. The trainee mediator gets to know, if the co-trainee, as mediator, uses different techniques, to handle the impasse, or takes precaution in such a way that all possible situations of impasse are carefully foreseen and effectively blocked or avoided.

ADVANTAGES

1. Such role plays will help the trainees in learning different techniques from co-trainees.
2. Trainees will understand shortfalls if any in their professionalism.
3. They will also know as to how a problem can be handled or tackled from different angles.
4. Trainees will also know how different solutions can be evolved.
5. Trainees get actively involved.
6. Trainees will learn the technique of preparing short role plays, which can help them in future if they choose to become trainers.

GROUND RULES

Trainer should inform the trainees to get in to the roles assigned to them, and take the role play very seriously. Trainees must be given a time slot for the role play. If trainees feel shortage of time, they may be permitted to continue with the role play before or after the training hours.

CONCLUSION

The two participants in each group have to be asked to mention in writing  (i) what did they learn from the mediator (ii) What did they not like in the mediation process (iii) What more could have been done by the mediator.

Trainees must be asked to write short answers with bullet points.

Advantage

While answering the questions given to them as mentioned above, trainees will reflect on the entire process. They take mediation very seriously. They try to observe everything. They also come to know that in actual mediations, disputing parties, participants, advocates will all be watching them carefully, and may be making mental note of very same aspects as being done by them now. Even the trainee who has played the role of mediator will work on improvement based on the constructive criticism offered by the co-trainees. This exercise will help the trainees in taking their professionalism to greater levels.

TRAINER’S PREPARATION

Trainer must see to it that each of the trainees is asked to prepare and bring at least one role play with facts of the case mediated by them but not settled. It is ideal to send a note to all the trainees along with the training schedule, so that on the very first day this exercise can begin. Where it is not possible to inform them before hand, at least on the very first day of training, they should be informed, so that from the second day the role play can begin.

Trainer must explain the objective of this technique to the trainees.

There may be situations where all the trainees may not bring the role plays as per the instructions given.

As an abundant caution it is desirable that the trainer brings one or two role plays  narrating facts of the mediated but unsettled case, and see how differently the trainees handle it.

Trainer must have sufficient copies of the following questionnaire to be answered by the trainees playing the role of disputing parties.

Each of the following questions must be written on different pages:

(i) What did they learn from the mediator?

(ii) What did they not like in the mediation process ?

(iii) What more could have been done by the mediator?

Thus the questionnaire will have three papers, with single question on each paper.

FORMAT

Page 1

At the end of the role play please answer in brief the following questions:-

Please Note: Answer to each question should not be in  more than two lines.

What did you  learn from the mediator?   (1)   (2)   (3)   (4)   (5)

Page 2

What did you not like in the mediation process ?   (1)   (2)   (3)   (4)   (5)

Page 3

What more could have been done by the mediator?   (1)   (2)   (3)   (4)   (5)

“Don’t complain. Just work harder.

Randy Pausch-  Co- Author of “The Last Lecture”

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Mega roleplay is one which starts on the first day of training and ends on the last day of the training.

It is supposed to be continued with the same participants. Ideally speaking all the participants have to be trainers. Where so many trainers are not available to play different roles, only then some amongst trainees can be chosen. However, the mediator’s role has to be necessarily taken by the trainer.

Structure

A role play with simple facts is to be chosen, so that any one should be able to understand the facts of the case within 3-4 minutes.

However challenging situations are to be created, in order to see to it that mediator demonstrates how the situation is handled making use of the theoretical knowledge given in the previous sessions.

Depending on the number of days of training, role play must be divided into different scenes/parts.

Trainees should not feel that the role play is being dragged. Participants in the role play must be briefed very well before commencing he role play. Trainer playing the role of mediator has to speak in such a way to ensure that with every sentence a message gets conveyed to the trainees.

The dialogues/conversations/discussions must be crisp and to the point. That is why it is ideal to have the co trainers play the role of participants.

Unwanted talk is to be completely avoided. Trainees and the participants should feel as though they are getting real life experience. 

Timing

It is ideal to have the mega role play at the end of every day’s session, so that the best practice stays in the mind of the trainees. While going back home from day’s session, only what is to be done, how, when and why it is to be done remains with the trainees. This helps in positive reinforcement. 

Trainer Mediator’s role

1. Wherever specific techniques or skills are used mediator should name the skill or technique used
2. Wherever barriers are seen, mediator has to identify and name the barrier and use the technique to overcome the barrier.
3. Styles of negotiation are to be identified.
4. Types of bargaining have to be identified and named
5. Types of impasse created has to be identified and named.
6. Technique to break the impasse has to be identified and informed.
7. Different types of questions have to be identified and named.

Purpose of Mega role play

1. It is quite common to see the trainees requesting the trainers themselves to play the role of mediator/s and demonstrate. Trainees will be eager to learn through the master’s performance.
2. When a mega role play is divided into different scenes and parts, essential tips, techniques and skills are introduced to the trainees in a phased manner.
3. Trainees learn how to assimilate theoretical knowledge with practical knowledge.
4. Notwithstanding several role plays being given to the trainees on each of the working days, each part of the mega role play, leaves an everlasting mark in their memory regarding ‘dos and do nots’.
5. Many questions troubling the trainees get answered through such role plays.

 “I am not smart, I pay attention. I am not considerate, I listen. I am not patient, I make time. I am not lucky, I work hard.” 

Mark W Boyer – Author

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One of the wonderful skills that can be used by a trainer while giving training in mediation is applying the technique of “What next?”

This technique is more useful while giving forty hours’ training in mediation.

Trainer should not forget that ultimate aim of forty hours’ training in mediation is to enable the trainees to handle mediations practically. Trainees must be equipped to  conduct mediations on their own. Different techniques and skills introduced to the trainees by the trainers have to be applied by the Mediators depending on the situations and circumstances, they come across.

 Two elements are always required to be known by any mediator:

1. What should the mediator do next?
2. What can the mediator do next?

This technique of ‘what next’ equips the potential mediators in both these fields.

Example

TOPIC – Opening Statement

After explaining what are all the elements of Opening statement, and after demonstrating an opening statement, trainer can make the trainees understand all the elements of Opening statement by following the technique of ‘what next’ as follows:

Trainer: After greeting and seating what do you do?

Trainees: Self-Introduction

Trainer: what next?

Trainees: Introduction of participants

Trainer: What next…?

Trainees: Opening statement

Trainer: what do you say first?

Trainees: What is mediation?

Trainer: What Next?

Trainee: Role of mediator

Trainer: What next ..

…….

……..

‘Method of Choral Response’

Choral response is a verbal response strategy.

The response can be given by the trainees  as an answer to a question or repetition of what the trainer has said .

Where the trainees do not respond, trainer can give them ‘cues’.

While using the technique of ‘What next’, trainer encourages the trainees to respond in unison, following the method of ‘Choral response.’   

Technique of What next is asked to be adapted in practical mediation

In joint session Party 1 speaks about the facts of dispute

Trainer: What do you do next?

Trainees: Paraphrase and Summarize

Trainer : and…….( Trainer is providing a cue that there is something more..)

Trainee: reflect ..( identify the interest and reflect the emption)  

In demonstrative role plays:

After the joint session when the mediator is about to call one of the parties for private session:

Trainer: What do you do now in private session?

Trainee mediator: I will ask this question…

Trainer:What next…..?

Trainee………….

Trainer: What next…..?

Trainee……………….

Thus trainer makes the mediator understand the importance of planning for each of the sessions, well before starting each of the sessions. Use of  technique of ‘what next’ helps a mediator to master three skills, (i) Setting an agenda (ii) Setting an atmosphere (iii) Streamlining the negotiation.

Mediator understands the importance of taking a compulsory break of at least a few minutes after every session, sit alone, work with paper and pen, chalk out the strategy and then proceed with the next session.

Advantages

By use of this technique trainer can help the trainees retain the procedural components and guard them against diluting the process requisites.

Choral response method helps the trainer to keep all the trainees engaged.

Repetition in unison helps in positive reinforcement.

Once you have mastered a technique, you hardly need look at a recipe again and can take off on your own.

            Julia Child – American Cooking teacher and author

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One of the essential requisites of Training in Mediation is that concept and application should come together.  

In order to fulfill this, it is ideal to use the (i) examples and (ii) questions.

Using examples is based on the principle that “What is unknown or not known can be understood or made to be understood through that which is known”.  

Using questions in learning process is based on the principle that “questions clarify the concepts”.

The first principle

Working through Examples

Concept

1. Dispute may be the result of a conflict
2. Conflict is a situation.
3. It arises when needs and/or interests and/or values and /or goals of one person overlaps with the needs and/or interests and/or values and /or goals of another person.
4. Need is something which cannot be negotiated but has to be satisfied.
5. Interest defines ‘why a person wants what he wants’
6. Values – “Principles/standards that are strongly believed by individual/s.”
7. Goals – End towards which effort is directed (Merriam Webster) 

Example

Case history:

Suma, a rich lady, who is married to a rich Mohammedan businessman, has filed a suit for partition against her widowed mother and two unmarried sisters. Property is a small house, which is the self-acquired property of her father.

Background:  

Suma wanted to get married. She did not want to negotiate on this (NEED)

She was interested in marriage because she was deeply in love with Usman. (INTEREST)

Suma had faith in humanity and did not believe in caste restrictions.  (VALUES)

Suma’s goal was to get married to Usman within 3 months, as he was moving to Gulf thereafter. She feared that he may not return from Gulf and may get married to someone else there.

Suma’s father: 

Suma’s father was focused on getting his daughter married at the right age as a responsible father.

(ESTEEM NEED) – Refer to Maslow’s hierarchy of needs.

He was interested in getting his daughter married because he was afraid that otherwise she would marry someone from other religion. (INTEREST)

He was against inter-caste or inter religion marriages. (VALUES)

After everyone convinced him about good nature of Usman, Suma’s father agreed for the marriage.

His goal was to get Suma’s two younger sisters married first, and later get Suma married with Usman. (GOAL).

Suma was unwilling to wait. She got married to Usman facing opposition from her parents. Suma’s father died. Suma’s mother and sisters did not allow her to be part of the family. Suma filed suit for partition, even though she was not interested in taking 1/4^th share in a small house.

ANALYSIS

In the above example though the needs and interests of Suma and her father were different, they did not overlap much. They were just differing needs and interests.

Their values overlapped.

Their strongly differing goals did not allow them to compromise.

Conflict is a situation which arises due to overlapping of needs, interests, values, goals or anyone or more of these of one person with that or those of the other.

Conflict arose.

Suma, who was very rich, filed a suit for partition against her poor mother and unmarried sisters.

Dispute is thus the result of conflict in the above referred case.

TIP FOR TRAINERS

While explaining a concept, ‘Develop the thought systematically and in sequence’.

CAUTION

Random thoughts will not take anyone anywhere.

“Organizing is what you do before you do something, so that when you do it, it is not all mixed up.”

A.A. Milne – English Novelist, Playwright and Poet

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The classification of trainers is meant for self-evolution. It can be done by individual trainers. Assessment by others may not always be correct. Many a times, even if proper assessment is made by someone other than the individual trainer, the trainer may not agree to it or accept it. 

Three broad classifications

LEVEL ONE:

Trainers who are inactive, and indifferent to what needs to be done, and what is being done and the consequence/s of the same.

They suffer from resistance to action from within. Such trainers always ask questions like “Why should I do it? Why should I do it now? Why should not I do it later? Why should not I avoid doing it?” and give favorable answers to themselves saying, ‘Let me do it later’ or ‘let me not do it’. Such “Why” questions, come from within as a resistance to action. 

They procrastinate a lot. They do not know or try to analyze the difference between urgent, important, not urgent and unimportant issues. They do not work on the principle of prioritization and time management.

They always have a ready answer with them “I will cross the bridge, when it comes”, knowing fully well that the bridge is right in front of them and they don’t have the ability to cross the bridge.

There will be complete chaos and confusion in them, to overcome which, they take shelter under postponement of preparation and lethargy.

They are deaf towards suggestions by others. They pretend to be listening without even hearing. They do not internalize the suggestions given. Feedback from others does not work.

Even after seeing better or best performance by other trainers, they just say “I was /am also equally good”, they are little better than me, that is all.” They try to pacify and reassure themselves with their own incorrect grading, even though they can know for sure that ‘their performance was poor’. They do not even allow their own conscience to guide them.

LEVEL TWO:

Trainers who are over active may fall under this category. Their preparation level will be too high. They take care of every minute aspect and they try to foresee all possibilities of risk.

But they are agitated.

They are stressed and strained.

They suffer a lot from performance pressure.

They get annoyed to meet situations about which they had not thought of.

Example

Even if a single slide which they want to show is missed, they feel lost like, and their session thereafter trails. 

They always look for appreciation from others.

They get demotivated when others do not appreciate them, even though they genuinely know that their performance was good or even very good.

They sink down, when other trainers who are not so capable as these trainers, are being appreciated more by others.

One can see more of action in them coupled with disturbance. More and more they are active, more and more they get disturbed, and this disturbance gets noticed by others.

In the process of trying to maneuver their internal disturbance their struggle gets exhibited. They are easily tagged by others as ‘agitated personalities’  

They try to criticize the person who gives them feedback.

They cannot handle constructive criticisms., and get agitated even by honest feedback. They start giving justifications. They start arguing with the person giving feedback, which is given in their own best interest.

They cannot comprehend that ‘they can also fail’.

LEVEL THREE:  

Some trainers who get into this category are objective, dynamic and peaceful.

They are not lethargic. They are not agitated.

They are calm and composed.

They are completely and systematically, well prepared.

They are well read, well informed, knowledgeable.

They are active yet peaceful. They are both dynamic and equanimous.

They are not disturbed by anything over which they don’t have control.

They handle any type of crisis, as though it is part of the training curriculum.

They do not aspire for appreciation from others.

They do not consider themselves as trainers but always place themselves under the category of ‘primary learners’ 

They look for ‘constructive criticisms’ They take feedback very positively. They do not ignore even the smallest mistake identified by someone in their presentation. They feel happy when others give feedback pointing out mistakes in their performance.

They try to analyze their own performance very objectively, and note down the mistakes committed by them, and make sincere effort to overcome the same. They reflect on what was done and what could have been done better. 

They work hard on themselves and enjoy that journey of constant learning.

They always have a single goal of ‘working for the cause’.

They are persons who have surrendered themselves to a larger cause.

The moment such trainers make an entry on the training floor trainees get an impression that ‘here is someone special’.

Understanding the Secret

Anybody can be in any of the three categories any time. Even though the idea is to move from level 1 or 2 to level 3, there is every chance that trainers from level 3 may skip to level 2 or 1, and so also trainers from level 2 may skip to level 1.

All have heard this:

“Mr. X was excellent when I attended his training in 2015. Today it was horrible”

As training is not a static but dynamic process, every trainer may have to make conscious effort to reach and be at level 3.  

Some of the characteristics of level three trainers may be in level two or one trainers also, so also, some of the characteristics of level one two trainers may be seen in level three trainers also. The moment some characteristics of level 2 or 1 is seen in level three trainers, they need to understand that they are no more in level three. The idea or the goal should be to eliminate all the characteristics of level one and two trainers and reach to level 3 completely and work hard to stay there or walk further forward.

Suggested Steps

1. Identify the level you are on.
2. If you find difficulty in identifying, ask your co-trainers to assist you.
3. Have a strategic plan to move to level 3, either from level 1 or level 2.
4. Work on overcoming each mistake that trainers in level 1 and 2, commit.
5. Work on developing all the qualities of trainers at level 3.
6. Work constantly and consciously on yourself to be at level three, and to move further forward.

‘Only you know what you are not’.

Slamw

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(All copyrights reserved by the author S.Susheela)

Training is a learning process for the trainer as well for the trainees.

Broadly speaking there are three tiers of learning process:

1. Learning by listening and reading.
2. Learning by reflection.
3. Experiential learning

Learning by Listening and Reading

In this, one’s focus is on receiving more and more information either by listening to different experts in the field or by reading. Information collection, assimilation of knowledge is the primary purpose here. Any individual undertaking to learn anything may have to go through this stage.

When it comes to 40 hours’ mediation training, this stage becomes more important.  In this the trainer’s effort is very active and the trainees’ effort will be comparatively passive. Trainer has to take lot of strain in seeing to it that the necessary information and basic knowledge related to nuances of mediation reaches the trainees. In order to do this, trainer has to have a treasure house of accurate knowledge with him/her. Trainees must be inspired to listen and read. They have to be properly guided in listening and must be motivated to receive more and more knowledge.

Learning by Reflection

 This is used by the trainer and trainee in refresher courses and in advanced trainings.

Here the trainer’s role is not as active as that of a trainee. Trainees must put cent percent effort and understand the benefits of learning by reflection. Trainer will stay behind and guide the trainees. Trainer will correct them if and whenever necessary.

Learning by reflection is a personal effort. No master can sit with the reflector all through. To know the advantage of learning by reflection, one has to work with masters who have inculcated this art. When learning is strengthened by reflection, the way in which one trains is different. So also, the way in which one conducts mediation will be different.     

Every trainee has to make immense effort to learn by reflection. Every concept that is introduced in the forty hours’ training, or learnt by the trainees either by listening to experts or by reading materials on the subject may have to be recapitulated. Every now and then the trainee should ask, why is this so? Why it is not so?  Nothing is taken for granted by any one is learning by reflection. They question, understand the logic behind and then agree or disagree. There is a sound homework done on every single sentence one speaks or every single act one does, post learning by reflection their behavior conduct and approach completely gets changed.  

Experiential Learning

In this, trainer remains as an observer. Trainees have to make all efforts to learn. They learn by their own experiences and also from experiences of the others. A question may arise then as to ‘why then a Master is necessary here’? Master gives inspiration to the trainees to understand the importance of possibility of experiential learning. The very presence and silent conduct of a master demonstrates ‘how one becomes a Master by experiential learning’. The possibility of being the best can be watched by the trainees, and they may also try to reach the same or even greater level than the master.

In this again, the trainees’ role is more and the trainer’s role is negligible. Trainee has to once again reach out to the learning by reflection, take out all that was learnt, and adapt it to the experiences and find out where he /she has gone wrong and why? And whether he/she could have done better?

EXAMPLE

Stage I. During 40 hours’ training in mediation

Trainer gives inputs on the skill of ‘reframing’.

Trainees listen to the trainer. They also collect various reading material on the subject and read the same seriously.

They conduct several mediations after completion of 40 hours’ training.

Stage II. During refresher course

Trainer says ’it is safe to avoid using the skill of ‘reframing’ in joint session, more particularly avoiding in the first joint session.’

Trainees will now start recapitulating what all they have listened to and read about reframing, and start thinking, ‘Why should not ‘reframing’ be done during joint session? Why should it be restricted to private session?’

They analyze this question from various angles and try to come to their own conclusions. They may or may not agree with the trainer’s statement.

Stage III: During advanced training

In a role play wherein subject matter is “divorce sought by the wife after 25 years of marriage”, wife tells the mediator:

Wife: My husband has been so cruel to me. He uses abusive language, he humiliates me in front of others, etc., he does not take responsibilities of any kind. I want divorce”.

Mediator: (While making a restatement, uses skills of summarizing, paraphrasing and reframing) Madam, according to you for various reasons as stated by you, there are disturbances in your matrimonial life which has hurt you a lot. Do you mean to say you are expecting to have love, care and respect from your husband?

Wife: Not any more. Enough is enough. I am not a fool to have any expectation from this man after 25 long years.

Husband: I will not give her divorce. Let her run to court till her death.

Matter gets referred back to court.

Analysis: Consider the damage caused here and the reasons for the same through reflection

Trainer takes the role of mediator in the same role play:   

Trainer spends quality time with the wife. Allows her to vent out emotions. Asks her to reveal about the past. Assists her to have an understanding on her own that ‘nothing in the past can be altered’ but ‘some thing about future can be worked out’. Asks her to analyze the advantages and disadvantages of taking divorce. Sets an atmosphere in another joint session for the husband to convey his regret about his conduct with the wife, and his sincere unconditional apologies, and his inability to live without his wife. Facilitates the parties to have empathetic connection. Then, trainer sets further private session with the wife. Allows her to reflect on the proposed decision in the backdrop of her husband’s commitment. When it comes from the wife that “I can consider living with my husband but I don’t know what to do …”. Then the Trainer-mediator, using the skill of reframing asks the question, “Do you mean to say ‘you expect love, care and respect from your husband?’ Wife says, “YES. That is all I wanted. That is all I want”.

Trainees learn by observing the experienced trainer playing the role of mediator.

“The only source of knowledge is experience”

Albert Einstein

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(All copy rights reserved by the author S. Susheela) 

Nothing in training is an empty formality. When any training program begins, it is customary that the trainers and the trainees get introduced to each other/s. When the trainer introduces himself/herself, most of the times, all the trainees will remember the name of the trainer and the contents of brief introduction. But when it comes to introduction of trainees, many do not pay equal attention. Nobody listens to the name and background of the trainee who is introducing himself/herself. Generally one of the trainers handles this ‘Session of  Introduction’. Said trainer moves to each of the trainees and asks to introduce himself or herself. 

The question for consideration here is:

At the end of this, if someone asks the said trainer to recognize all the trainees by name  will the trainer be able to do so?

What about the other co-trainers?

What about the trainees?

If the training is organized for a group of trainees from different places, usually those from one place may recognize the other/s from the same place. But that is not the point for consideration here.

Who amongst all (trainers, trainees) immediately after the ‘Session of Introduction’ can recognize each one by name, and brief background of each?  

If none can do it why is this empty formality being followed in every training program consuming not less than 20-30 minutes?

IMPORTANCE OF SESSION OF INTRODUCTION

1. One can learn how impressively one can introduce oneself so that the others never forget him/her.
2. How does one use his voice, tone , confidence while giving self introduction?
3. How first impression can be created?
4. How important one feels when some one respectfully  introduces him/her/addresses  him/her by name? “Introduction is the starting point of connection between two  or more individuals.”
5. Trainer will get a cue on the level of confidence of each of the trainees, within 30 seconds, taken by each for self-introduction.
6. Mediation and Mediation training being a team work, it is important to know each other by name for effective co-ordination. 

ICE BREAKER FOR ‘SESSION OF INTRODUCTION‘

(Let us assume there are twenty persons including the trainer and the trainees)

Instruction by trainer: 

I will introduce myself and pass on the mike to the person standing next to me. The next person introduces himself or herself and also the previously introduced person, and passes on the mike to the next person. The chain continues. You can go near each of them while introducing.

• All the trainees and the trainers stand in a line next to each other.
• First, a Trainer introduces himself/herself and passes on the mike to next person.

Example: I am Susheela. (mike is passed on)

• The second person introduces himself/herself, and introduces the one who had introduced earlier.

Example: I am Uma, She is Susheela.

• The third person introduces himself/herself and introduces the first two also.

Example: I am Raju, she is Ms.Uma, and she is Mrs. Susheela.

The process continues till the last person in the line introduces himself/herself and introduces all the 19 who were introduced earlier. The twentieth person should tell all the names including that of Susheela who had introduced herself as the first person.  Thus the chain should get completed.

Trainer can call upon any trainee who can introduce all the trainees. Such trainee may be rewarded as a token of appreciation. (Even a big round of applause can work)

Advantage of this exercise

1. Trainees will work on their retention capacity and attention span when they come to know on their own that they are unable to remember 3-4/5-10 names.
2. They learn the importance of focus.
3. Trainers will also know that ‘nothing in training can be done by the trainers without there being a purpose’. They will also work on focusing, and increasing the capacity of retention.

De-briefing

Trainer can give debriefing on the following lines:

1. Some could not remember the names either because the person who was introducing did not invite the attention of others and introduced himself/herself. Maybe the introduction was very passive and impressive.
   Or
   Because the other person/s did not pay attention to the person who was introducing.
2. While introducing others, using forefinger is to be avoided. Open hand gesture is a respectful gesture.
3. Some could not remember because they did not give command to themselves to  remember the names.
4. Some could not remember because they did not find it important to remember others’ names.
5. In actual mediation it is necessary to remember the names of parties, advocates, third parties as the same will help in trust building process. This exercise is a small step in developing that skill.
6. First lesson in humility.

CONCEPT MESSAGE

Adults retain such information only which they feel as important.     

The same exercise can be  repeated after 2-3 days, and trainer can find out whether different result are seen.

“ One cannot demonstrate humility. It should be part of one’s life”.

Slamw

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                                                                                                                                    S.SUSHEELA

(All Copyrights reserved by the author S.Susheela)